Funny quotes about socks

Ever wonder what people got Jesus for Christmas? It's like, "Oh great, socks. You know I'm dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They'll go great with my sandals. What am I, German?"

I woke up this morning and couldn't find my socks, so I called information. She said they were behind the couch. She was right.

I don't have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They're upstairs in my socks.

You know you're getting fat when your socks don't fit.

(On actress Emma Watson.) She didn’t want to be my friend at school. She’ll probably be in a queue of people who are after me. We found some socks with her name tag in so we whacked them on eBay. We thought, ‘She’s doing well for herself, let’s make some money.’ I can’t recall what we got for the socks but it wasn’t over a fiver.