Funny quotes about lips
Jim Gaffigan quotesWhy do you have to be out of town to write a postcard? I want a to write a postcard to my neighbor: "I still live near you!" The guy sees me go into my apartment, flips the card over, it's just a picture of me holding a rifle.
Sarah Silverman quotesYou got it, doll, I was curious to see which Courtney Love was going to show up: the smeared-lipstick crazy coke whore or the violent smeared-lipstick crazy coke whore.
Chris Rock quotesIs it just me, or is he the greasiest nigga you ever seen in your life? Every time Jermaine comes on, I gotta wipe the grease off the screen! Can't see shit! Jermaine must have been on. Even the police can't catch his ass, 'cause every time they try, he just slips out! They be like, "Somebody throw some sand on that nigga! Please!"
Rodney Dangerfield quotesIt's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
Jerry Seinfeld quotesWhere lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
Katt Williams quotesMy legs tired, ain't your legs tired!? His legs ain't Tired! He Just... Tinktinktinktinktinktink, TinktinkTinktinkTinktink!! Just paperclips and Sparks everywhere!
Adam Carolla quotesThen there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.
Jim Norton quotesAnd while all of your friends are grieving at your wake, I hope the sprinkler system turns on and sprays them with AIDS, hepatitis C and liquified genital warts. And while they're all running out and crying, I hope one of them slips and accidentally molests a child.
quotesWhite people can't dance. I'm not being racist; it's true. Just like when white people say black people have big lips, it's not racist; it's true. Black people have big lips, white people can't dance. Some brothers will be in the club and white people are like, "What are those niggers doing in here?" They watchin' y'all dance. And they're like, "Look at these crazy muthafuckas." Y'all be stepping on people's feet and hitting one another.
