Funny quotes about fat
Tim Allen quotesMy stepfather stepped in where no man would've stepped in — six kids, five of them boys — and that's heroic.
Louie Anderson quotesCredit-card debt and day trading-I feel like Michael Corleone in Godfather III, just when I think out, they pull me back in.
Rodney Dangerfield quotesAnd my girlfriend, she's FAT! How fat? She's so fat she wears two watches--one for each time zone!
I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father, "I'm very sorry. We did everything we could...but he pulled through."
My father was stupid. He worked in a bank and they caught him stealing pens.
My wife is so fat that when she lays on the beach the people feel sorry for her and try to roll her back into the water.
Rita Rudner quotesI never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
Dennis Miller quotesA recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.
Bob Monkhouse quotes
