Funny quotes about couples

Whenever you are single, all you see are couples, but whenever you are a couple, all you see are hookers.

They have the greeting cards with the couples on the front. They photograph them. These hazy focus people. They’re always having picnics. There’s always a tree, a pond… who are these people? I don’t know them. I don’t want them on my card either. What am I going to write inside there anyway? “Here’s another couple having a better relationship than us.”