Funny Mitch Hedberg quotes

I think animal crackers make people think that all animals taste the same.

Here's a thought for sweat shop owners: Air Conditioning. Problem solved.

What am I drinking? NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier'n helpin' 'em move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.

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