Comedian Rodney Dangerfield

Top 5 quotes

My wife has to be the worst cook. In my house, we pray after we eat.

One night she told me to put out the garbage. I told her "you cooked it, you take it out".

My girlfriend is so ugly, two guys broke into her apartment. She yelled "Rape!" They yelled "NO!"

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Rodney Dangerfield quotes

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