Comedian Mitch Hedberg

American stand-up comedian known for his surreal humor and unconventional comedic delivery. His comedy typically featured short, sometimes one-line jokes, mixed with absurd elements and non sequiturs.

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Top 5 quotes

What am I drinking? NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.

The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're relentless.

Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic! Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupus! One of those two doesn't sound right.

I want to hang a map of the world in my house then I’m gonna put pins into all the locations that I’ve travelled to. But first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won’t fall down.

When I was a boy, I laid in my twin size bed, wondering where my brother was.

Mitch Hedberg quotes

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