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Best short quotes
I wonder if in 2050 there will be a movie called, 'Dude, Where's My Spaceship.'
School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.
So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.
If you don't think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD's and burn them.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
Just hit the blunt one time and see if it don't change your perception on whats important in your life.
Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.
Look at his face. I bet his cornflakes try to crawl out of the bowl.
My brother has ADD, which is weird because he drives a Ford Focus. I told my brother that joke but he didn't laugh because he got distracted by my shoe strings.
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
What is stand-up comedy?
Stand-up comedy is a performance for a live audience. Usually one or multiple performers called comics or stand-up comedians are speaking directly to their audience. Typically a performer tells a routine of jokes or funny monologue with various stories and anecdotes chained together.
It's not uncommon for acting, pantomime, magic tricks * or singing to be used to increase variety of such performance.
In United Kingdom stand-up comedy began gaining popularity in 18th century and raised many great performers like Arthur Askey, Max Miller and Ken Dodd. The comedians were heavily censored and had to get their act approved and adapted to the censorship.
